Is This A Sign?

My sister Stef called me tonight to ask about what was happening with the house. The update is that our closing was again rescheduled for Tuesday afternoon, however the FHA is again questioning our bank accounts. Because we had received cash gifts from family members for the downpayment, our bank accounts increased, which is the eyes of the government was extremely questionable. A little bit of background on this, our mortgage guy told us in February that it is ok for family memebers to gift money to us. We would maybe have to provide a letter stating that it was a gift. Ok, flash forward to last week, Dan and I had to write a sworn statement, listing each check amount, date, who it was from, with scanned copies of the checks. We had to sign it in blood..........ok just kidding. But seriously, last Friday, our mortgage guy Larry received this letter and said "everything is good to go and on track for closing Tuesday night, no problem" (I can almost see him sitting in his office, fingers crossed, laughing hysterically and hitting his knee as he typed the email to us..........)

Today, as we finalized what time all of us would arrive at the walk through and then the closing tomorrow, Larry calls Dan. He told him that the FHA underwriter has to have sworn written statements from my mom, my grandpa, and Dan's dad that the money they provided us was a gift and does not have to be paid back. I about freaked out, but I was good, I just had a small crying session in my bedroom and fell asleep into a nap. Well, there were a thousand complications with this, one being that my grandpa is in the hospital and can't write a statement and have it faxed over to us. Good thing mom is on his bank account, a joint account, she had to sign two letters, one for her single account and one for her joint. Holy crimminy, this whole thing has been a horrible nightmare. And for you that know my mom, she DOES NOT take stress lightly. Anything to throw anyone off the expected track of life, will derail her for days. She was super upset and yelling, I calmed her down and told her not to take on our worries too.....which most mom's do.....right? :)

Well, all of the documents, my pet's adoptions papers, the deed to my first child, and our car's titles are now all in the hands of the bank. If we don't get the house now, I don't know what else they will have up their sleeves. Dan said he asked Larry, very firmly, if he expected anymore surprises with the F@#$ing loan, Larry said no, but he's said that the last four closing date changes. It's like the boy that cried wolf, I just can't beleive him anymore.

Anywho, Stef asked me "Do you think this is a sign from the universe?" Of course I have mulled over this question numerous times in my head, let me tell you, numerous times. I am a pretty strong beleiver that things happen for a reason and if the universe didn't think this was the path we should be taking, I don't think we will get this loan. However, since we're still 'on track' and apparently the loan is already approved, if we back out now, taking as a sign from the universe that this is maybe not the time for us to buy a house, then we would be out all of the earnest money and inspection money and whatever else fees we have spent.

Think about it, if you're on a road trip, you get a flat tire, what do you do? You pull into a tire place and get a new one. You're driving along, you're thermometer goes crazy and you overheat, what do you do? Go to a garage and get it fixed. Then as you're driving away, you come across a huge storm in Iowa and it hails, ruining your paint job, what do you do? Do you quit and just decide to go home? No! You keep pushing on to your destination. It's not how fast you get there, it's in what you learn along the way of your journey.

I've been thinking more and more about the buddhist teaching of 'You are what you think'. I beleive this is not a sign from the universe that we shouldn't be doing this, but a teaching of patience and courage. I'm going to need a lot of that with what is on my future horizon.........

Swimming in this Sea of Life,
La Sirena

Buyer and Sellers Wild Ride!

The closing got moved again. It is all in the bank’s hands and always has been. We did our part. We got the inspection done on time, the inspection repairs completed, and the title company contacted and ready to go. The appraisal and the loan are in the control of the bank. The appraisal was lost and then finished late, which delayed the first loan approval. The mortgage insurance denied us the Freddie Mac loan, which I found out was actually approved, it was just that the mortgage insurance turned us down. Then the FHA loan is approved and apparently, the mortgage insurance did accept us, however we have to pay a part of the premium up front – which ultimately lowered our down payment, increased the loan amount and increased the monthly payments $20. UGH!!

I just heard this morning that the seller has a moving van set to load on Thursday and set to drive away Friday morning at 6am. Talk about being a nervous wreck on both sides. I mean, I guess, really for hubby and I, we just have to get the house or know something by next week. If we don’t get the house, which I’m pretty sure we will, we would have to go find another rental in the next two weeks. I have no idea what the seller would do though. This sucks, especially when it is out of our hands. We did everything they asked us to do, plus we got pre-qualified, stayed way below what we were approved for, etc. The bank is taking forever and being picky, but maybe that’s the fallout from all of the housing issues. They are scared to move forward on anything and just like in most business transactions, they promise you one thing and deliver another!

The bank is complaining that the realtors don’t understand how long this takes and then the realtor is complaining that the bank has had enough time to pull it all together. Geesh, then we’re stuck in-between, filling out paperwork, signing docs, and endlessly sending through more information, along with emotionally trying to hold it all together. It’s hard enough going into such a huge step in one’s life and when things don’t go very smoothly, it’s hard to trust the system moving forward. Just yesterday they asked again for full copies of our 2007 and 2008 taxes. We had already given them that and I was sort of teed off that they asked for it again. Then they wanted a letter of explanation why we had an increase in our bank accounts. We called them last week, advising that we had received cash gifts from our parents for the down payment and asked if they needed that letter of explanation. They said no, it’s fine and what do they do last night at 4:30pm?! They call and say “oh yah, we need a letter of explanation”.

I know it will work out and we’ll be drinking champagne on the front porch of the new house on Thursday afternoon, it’s just been Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride to get there!!!!

Swimming in this Sea of Life,
La Sirena

Images were used from Google image look up results. Thanks Disney for such a cute and crazy ride at the park!

Happy 4th of July!

Independence Day. So fitting that I dreamt about being in New York City last night. I was on a business trip and I only had enough time to see one tourist sight. I was going to go to the planetarium (do they even have one of those?), but then I decided to go see the Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island, where my great grandparent's names are displayed, from when they arrived in the USA.

We're getting ready and packing up for a trip up to the FC for a BBQ and fireworks. My sister's boyfriend has his family in town and they get to meet my mom. We have so much food planned, but I guess that's ok because we'll technically be there for 10 hours, what's that two meals and a snack? Ha! LOL I made some homemade pretzels sticks and mom and I made a chocolate torte, which I will post pictures of later this week. It was so decadent and sooooooooooo delicious, we made two so of course we had to try it last night :)

News on the house, the closing got moved to July 7th, one day later. It might be moved out further if the loan doesn't get approved. Back in January when we started this whole process we were pre-qualified for a Fannie May / Freddie Mac loan. We stayed WELL below their suggested qualified total amount, I mean like $40K less. Then when the appraisal got done and the the underwriter was adding it all up, we were denied that loan. So now the loan is being looked at by an underwriter by the FHA. We're hoping it will go through there because we were originally qualified for the Fannie May loan, which since then that company has gone through some serious issues and a bailout themselves. Maybe that's why, maybe they became way more stringent. We have excellent credit scores and jobs and savings and a really good downpayment, so I am really hoping we're not denied a loan by the FHA.

We already gave notice at our rental, so if we don't get to buy this house, we will have to scramble to rent another place. This is definitely an adventure, one that is causing more stress than necesssary, but I'm making the stress in my mind really. I need to just trust that everything happens for a reason and my path will be shown to me. It's how I react to the situation. I could be freaking out, but I'm too done with that, not worth it, where does it get you? No where. So day by day, we'll take it and make the best decisions possible.

Swimming in this Sea of Life, Happy 4th,
La Sirena

Don't be afraid of conflict

At work this week, I was put in a position where I was faced with conflict and confirontation. I've been working with this person closely since the merger, although she's not physically in my office. Without disclosing too much, she often shoots off emails about updates she has received on important projects. These response emails she sends over to us are harsh, they read as if she doesn't trust us or the work we are doing and they blatantly point out that she's not reading the updates she is provided.

So I wrote an email back, it wasn't rude, but it was very straight forward about the fact that we had already provided an update and extreme information in spreadsheets, reports, etc to her and I was concerned where all of her frustration was coming from. Anywho, she never answered that email. That is very typical of her, head bent down, with her tail between her legs, walking away. She couldn't even admit she was wrong.

It's frustrating because I don't like conflict and confrontation, but it's necessary because you can't avoid it. It's really all in how you approach it. The next morning, I was printing something out and I found this quote from a woman's daily inspiration website onthe printer:

"It's natural to become agitated when you face conflict or disagreement. But when you think about it, conflict is a part of life. It's inescapable.

Approaching conflict with a sense of calmness goes a whole lot further in making peace than getting all worked up.

Abandon the concept of winning and losing when facing disagreement. Instead, think in terms of resolution. Be flexible.

When the other side senses that you're interested in finding a solution, they will be much more agreement. Rather than confrontation and conflict, you can work together in cooperation to find a solution that suits you both."

It didn't have an author, so I'm not sure who to give credit to. I hung it on my computer to give me confidence that it is ok to push back, to bring up things that are tough to talk about. Have confidence and approach it with calmness and peace and resolution. This just doesn't apply to work, but also at home with friends and family.

Swimming in this Sea of Life,
La Sirena

Sweet Dreams

Last night I had the most crazy dream. I was at a school, not sure which one, but it seemed like a highschool. I was in a class and we were carving long wooden poles. Everyone was doing theirs the same except for me, mine was carved different. After that, we had a class for running. I was running and feeling great, I didn't want to stop. While we were running around the track, there was a dinner being set up in the middle of the gym/field. Everyone stopped running and went to this dinner, which apparently was an awards dinner. I didn't want to stop running, but they talked me into coming over to the dinner. I saw the salads, meat, enchiladas, and just got a little spoonful of the refriend beans and a tamale. I took that back to my table and turned around and noticed the desserts.

I ran to the desserts, I started filling my plate with cheesecake, strawberry shortcake, chocolate cake, ice cream, you name it! My plate was sooooo full. Someone commented about it and then another person sitting next to me said I was craving desserts. It was so weird. Then I saw these gold and silver sparkling cupcakes, glittery and yummy with vanilla frosting and sprinkles. I was like a rabid wolf running towards it's prey and I attacked those cupcakes. I couldn't get enough! Ha! What the hell, I woke up then. I was craving those desserts, heck I'm still thinking about them and it's only 9am.

It's a funny and strange dream. It's so weird because I am not one that even likes desserts. I maybe have desserts or something sweet once a month, maybe and if I do, it's usually a piece of dark chocolate. Well, I'm having granola, vanilla yogurt, and raspberries this morning, hoping that will suffice. LOL

Father's Day, Summer Solstice, and Updates

Before I get into some updates, I would like to say Happy Father's Day to my Grandpa back in Indiana. I love you and miss you.


I would also like to tell everyone Happy Summer Solstice! Today is the longest day of the year so enjoy! The sun will start it's long slow decent back to fall and the days will start getting shorter.

Laundry Sunday, again tonight. Seven loads. It's mostly because we went camping again this weekend and have a lot of smelly campfire dirt ridden clothes. I'm sitting in the laundry / back room again because I haven't gotten an airport card yet in order to sit on my comfy couch to post on the blog. There's been a lot going on and getting an airport card has been low on the priority list.

We're backing potatoes this evening, I haven't had one of those in probably six months. They're super tasty, they just take too long to bake and I don't have patience for them. We're also having grilled trout Dan caught at Green Mountain Reservoir this weekend. Yummy.

Now onto some updates. I haven't posted some of these things in a long time. It's funny, last year I was really into taking pictures and putting up posts on all the happenings of the summer. This year not so much. There's a lot going on, but maybe that's just it, too much going on so I haven't had time nor the heart to post anything.

First things first, the garden. It's dead. Colorado has seen some weird weather this past month. I put in my pumpkin, pepper, and tomato seedlings the weekend after memorial day. I would post a picture, but since I've not been into the camera lately there is none. Well, it has hailed and rained everyday since. They are all gone. Except! The peppers and the two tomato plants I put in transferable pots, they are still somewhat alive. I am hoping to take them to the new house.

Speaking of the new house, the closing is still scheduled for July 6th. The inspection is done and the seller is currently getting estimates for the things we asked her to fix before then. The appraisal gets done this week. I am hoping everything goes as planned because I took that day off of work and my mom will be in town to get to see the house. How cool is that?! Here's a little sneak peak of the front of the house. I promise I will post pictures once we move in!


The job is going a bit better. I had a reporting project taken off my plate, it's not much but it does help because I really didn't like reporting to this one particular person. My position has switched a 180 degree turn for last week and this coming week. Too hard to explain, but my other project is on hold. Which is fine, but the one I have to focus on for the next week is the one I particularly do not enjoy. But I'm making the best of it and hopefully it will be mostly cleaned up by Friday. Then I can get back to normal.

Oh yah, one last update. My dog Jorge. He LOVES peanuts.......

To all a lovely week, Swimming in this Sea of Life,
La Sirena

So tired

I'm so tired I feel like I could sleep for days. All day I have a lot of energy, only on Mondays and Tuesdays, come Wednesdays I start to slow down. I'm thirsty. I'm not looking forward to the heat of the summer and I am so very much enjoying the rain and storms everyday.

Not much going on, the light's been poking through and the blanket's been lifting off of me a bit. Things are starting to turn around, it just takes time.

Buddha said "All that we are is the result of what we have thought. If a man speaks or acts with an evil thought, pain follows him. If a man speaks or acts with a pure thought, happiness follows him, like a shadow that never leaves him."

Swimming in this Sea of Life,
La Sirena